ITT We Make A List Of Weapon Skills.

I start:
Stabbage Blade
Mystic Bonk
Lolcleaver
Can't du Cygne (when your blu is undergeared and insists on spamming cdc)
Stabbalic Mandie (a thf Mandragora stabs you)
Gateau of Tartare (unlocks on blm with 110 cooking skill)
Tornado *** (stronger version of Spinning Attack)
Raging Fisting/Howling Fisting (depends if lube is used or not)
Impotency (no wonder DRKs are moody)
Star Liver

from Taz:
Gate of Tarutarus

from sekuroon:
Mordant Lime (added effect: flavor)
Namaste Arrow (bye)
Gate of Tartar sauce
Spirit Faker (my favorite)
Tachi: Futa (it's a hybrid WS: it has both parts)
Penta Rust (when you haven't used your pole in a while)
Primal Bender (animals are amazing but it's a lonely life)
Herculean Thrust
Death Bosom
Red Coitus Blade

Skillchains:
Tornado *** > Herculean Thrust (Detonation) > Howling Fist (Fragmentation)
Impotency > Red Coitus Blade (Induration) > Mercy Stroke (Light)
Tornado *** > Death Bosom (Compression) > Impotency (Darkness)
Primal Bender > Star Liver (Vomitation) > Impulse Drive (Impaction)
Impotency > Camlann's Torment (Depression) > Catastrophe (Darkness)

Tachi: MissFudo (Striving to irritate you every weaponskill chance)

Cabbage Blade?

New Year's Resolution
Bored Axe Hell
Cloudshitter (AoE, clearly)
Raging Axehole
Realm Razor (You only use this one down there.)
Mercy Stroke Me
Megatron Torment
Ukko's A Furry
Dr. Slice
Cat-***-trophy (Mithras, amirite)

Shoulder Tickles - doesn't hurt, only lulz
One Inch Peen - when that MNK just won't get you there
Both hands Blow - when said MNK also won't give up trying
A$S you ran! Firsts - for retribution after the party leaves you to die
Hey-yo-lian edge - when the frat is AOE burning dyna
More dented Rhymes - when the BRD needs to work on his verse, badly
Pyurrring Leos - Cait Sith, in a lion skin, party raping new attack
Fast Bleed - RDM dying faster than he DDing
Burning Blade - RDM needs to stop whoring it up and get a cream for that
Shining Blads - Less polishing. I SAID LESS POLISHING! OMG, get out of the house more.
Seraph Blade - Damn. Now it's dead. Good job, no I will not cast arise on it again.
Circled Blades - If you can picture this, I'm sorry. Also, probably how the burning blades problem made the rounds in the first place.
Swiffed Blade - Sure, it's clean now, but that's not why I bought that swiffer.
Sang Whineblade - BRD left all his daggers at home, making the best of it.
Death Bosom - Lilith caught you staring again, die to dread spikes.
Atonement - Too late, you still dying to dread spikes
Knights of Round - the guys who "won" the circled blades "tournament"
Request Scat - NO. OMG go wash your hands. YES, again!
Hard Slash - What your current boyfriend can't do for you.
Power Slash - What your ex boyfriend used to do for you quite well
Shockerwave - Why he's now your ex boyfriend
Die Mediation - The RUN wants to DD but dies instead
Her Clean Slash - when she's keeping up on her personal hygiene
Minstrel Axe - Worst BRD ever. Wait, is he drunk? What do you mean you "sang Wine Blade"?!
Shield Brake - PLD tries to slow things down, real problem is he should have made an Ochain
Weapon Break - Another reason he's your ex, it's not supposed to bend like that. Probably never going to recover.
Up heave all - What's going to happen to all that Sang Wine. Not a super effective attack
Meta game Torment - Listening to the RNG try to talk the GEO into spamming Savage Blade
Dark Harvest - The surprise the ex got from you after his ill fated attempt to shocker wave
Shadow of Deaf - Better than being able to hear the BRD try to sing up more wine. Keeping him silenced is now the WHM's only job
Spiral Hell - what everyone else calls the RDM's Circled Blades
En-trophy - A bit of extra damage from falling participation trophies. The DRK does think this makes him viable damage.
Quiet yous! - When you need the voice chat clear for raid business (auto mutes the BRD, the RDM and the RNG)
Double Thrust - BF's signature starting (but also finishing) move.
Thunder Thrust - Thai food may have been a bad choice for date night
Raid Thrust - all 16? you go...girl?
Leg sweep - well, while you're down there....
Pent up Thrust - No, you can help it, you think conjunctivitis is fun?
Skew her - You know, when you angle the polearm to hit it from the side a bit
Impulse drive - You knew better, but now you got your polearm in crazy and there's going to be hell to pay
Sonic Thrust - So fast he breaks the sound barrier. Why are you acting proud of yourself!? Ugh.
Star Diver - You know that's how you got that e. coli right? Yes, that's how the BLU got it too, y'all need mouthwash.
Cam girl's Torment - all your onlyfans too poor cuz they bought gil
Drakesbane - glasses of champagne out on the dancefloor
Blade: Restu - NIN fell asleep in the middle of the raid
Blade: Takey - So you confiscate their share of the payout
Blade: Eeee - the wailing noise they make in the morning when they find out
Blade: Kool - the NIN working in extra WS, says it boosts dmg (it doesn't)
Blade: Yule - the NIN is cosplaying for xmas. Says it boosts dmg (still doesn't)
Blade: High - probably the reason the NIN had to Blade:Restu
Blade: Karma - what goes around comes around, you gonna pay for that nap
Blade: Shun - what the LS does to the NIN when sending invites out to the next even
Touchy: Feely - the way the SAM wants to "repay" the WHM for her "help"
Touchy: Ahegao - how he thinks she'll react
Tachi: GTFO - how she vigorously responds... with a beatstick
Tachi: Show-her - the SAM plots revenge, but he's still the a-hole
Tachi: Kite-them - what the SAM will have to do when he gets aggro, since he will get no heals
Tachi: Shower - what the WHM will have to do to feel clean again
Rock Crusher - The inevitable "reward" for this kind of behavior
Full swing - warming up for a Rock Crusher that will really Shattersouls
Myrkr - the gurgling noise which results from the Brainshaking Judgement unleashed like a Cataclysm upon his Black Halo when he persists
Exudation - the leaking coming out of the SAM after a Myrkr
Numbing Shot - what the paramedics bring to the scene to help the SAM
Slapstick - the rest of the LS laughing at the evident suffering of the SAM
Knockout - the WHM. It's still not her fault
String Clipper - The WHM's new nickname


Not Sorry.

Tachi: Shohahahahaha you missed

Tachi: Shohananas.

This post will be censored in France.

^ this!!

Pecking Furry